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Kia Stephens

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September 21, 2015

Why You Shouldn’t Ignore the Fatherless

September 21, 2015 | By | 18 Comments

I have worked with the fatherless for 14 years and what I’ve seen would make you weep.  Many of the kids I serve are schooled by the harsh realities of life before they ever learn from a teacher.  Their stories are difficult, seemingly unreal and greatly impacted by an ever-increasing fatherless epidemic.  Often the men in their lives are:

Incarcerated  

Violent and Abusive  

Non Existent

Drug Addicted  

Unemployed  

Criminals &

Uneducated  

Repeatedly the mothers of these children look for love in the arms of the aforementioned men because they themselves were not fathered.  Believing the lie that sex equates to love they bring yet another child into this world.  Thus, a vicious cycle is perpetuated, lending itself to single parent households with multiple children each fathered by a different man.

For an entire generation this is the norm.  Gone is the American dream of a 4.5 family nestled behind a white picket fence.  This dream has been reduced to a distant mirage; out of reach and foreign.     

As a result many of these children are angry and they don’t know why.  Little things like a broken pencil or a difficult math problem sky rockets them from zero to one hundred in seconds.  They become bombs and schools are dangerous minefields attempting to teach the mind and heal the soul.  

When violence, poverty, and broken promises are a child’s daily norm their communication may become a thrown desk, a ripped book, or an act of defiance.  It saddens me to say this fury has replaced peace and innocence for many.  And unfortunately, this reality is not isolated to one school; the problem is spreading across the nation.

 If I am honest, I will admit on more than a few occasions, I’d rather get in my car, drive to some suburban bubble and pretend environments like this don’t exist.  The temptation to ignore the signs of a fatherless generation woos me daily.  Sometimes I don’t want to know about that carjacking on the South side, the latest drive by shooting, or the umpteenth teenage pregnancy.  I just want a Utopian society instead of the constant bombardment of societies woes.

This is not to say the fatherless dilemma is relegated to the city.  Although it appears to be more prevalent and readily seen in urban areas, this issue is not confined to one geographical location. For this reason it cannot be ignored.

As much as I want to anesthetize myself, I can’t.  

 The God of the universe stepped out of heavenly bliss and into a broken world in order to provide hope for those who need it.  If we choose to follow His example I believe there are three things we must do about fatherlessness.

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# 1 Care

Life’s demands are unending.  Everyone has a cause and fatherlessness may not be high on your list of priorities.  I get it.

However, caring is doable.  Compassion only requires a change in your perspective.  Allow yourself to hear, know, understand, and be concerned about the plight of the fatherless.

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# 2 Pray

 The Bible says, “The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.” James 5:16 (NIV)  I choose to believe it.

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And so I get down on my knees and speak the names of those I know and the ones I don’t who are fatherless.  I pray for their healing, hope, courage, freedom, forgiveness and peace.  Against all doubt I choose to believe God will intervene and alter the trajectory of their life’s circumstances.   I pray like it is their only hope, because it just might be.  I am compelled to invite you to join me.

# 3 Act

For years I carried a burden for the fatherless.  I found myself either talking, analyzing, debating, wrestling, or crying about the subject.  God combined my passion with personal experience and birthed this blog.  

Is there something He wants you to do?

Mentor

Volunteer

Teach

Pray

Hug

Love

Invite

God is so concerned about the fatherless He mentions the word 43 times in the Bible.  Don’t disregard the prompting to act; it may change the life of the fatherless and yours too.

 

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GET encouragement In YOUR

Comments

  1. Wow! Great post, Kia! I love the actionable steps towards the end of your post. The plight of the fatherless is daunting but there is something that everyone can do to make a difference. Care. Pray. Act

    • Yes! I hope these words will impact a nation to do something. There are so many kids with an incredible ache and one day they will be adults. There is an incredible opportunity to make a difference in the lives of these children. Robert, I am so glad you joined the conversation. Be blessed! – Kia

  2. What an incredible testimony to the passion in your heart planted by the Father of all. I must admit I too often overlook so many in the world and just get on with my own little life and my own little ministry I feel called to but we are called to go into ALL the world…to ALL people! Thank you for opening my eyes to so much more and I will be looking out for how I can care but in the meantime, pray. Blessed to be your #RaRaLinkup neighbor today Kia 🙂
    Sarah Travis recently posted…Overcoming hurdles of identity!My Profile

    • Sarah, thank you for being transparent. I think we are all guilty at times of being concerned with our little world but God has truly called us to go into all the world. I so appreciate your prayers for the fatherless. I believe prayer is powerful, definitely needed, and it will have an impact. Thanks for joining the conversation Sarah. Be blessed! – Kia

  3. Beautiful message and reminders today, Kia. Thank you also for listing action steps for your readers. These are great suggestions. Mentoring is fun, fulfilling, and such a rewarding experience!

    • Kristine, thanks so much for your encouragement. I hope these action steps will inspire others to act on behalf of the fatherless. Thanks for joining the conversation and be blessed! – Kia

  4. Kia, if we ignore the fatherless we are ignoring THE FATHER. God forbid. Visiting from WWI #6
    Susan Shipe recently posted…from the cracksMy Profile

    • I love your words Susan, well said. God is very concerned about the fatherless. Your words directly strike at the heart of the matter. Thank you for joining the conversation today. Be blessed! – Kia

  5. Kia, I love the steps you lay out but especially #2 – “speaking to an invisible God about a massive problem may seem ineffective but it is not.” That applies to so much!! Thank you friend. Good words again. #livefreeThursday
    Lisa Appelo @TrueandFaithful.net recently posted…31 Days: Braving the BrokenMy Profile

    • Lisa, sometimes it is tough when you don’t see an immediate response to prayer. That statement is a reminder to me about how powerful prayer is. It is such a pleasure to connect with you. Thanks for joining the conversation today. Be blessed! – Kia

  6. Kia, these are powerful and Scripture-saturated words. May God continue to stoke the fire in your soul for this cause.
    Michele Morin recently posted…The Language of ThanksgivingMy Profile

    • Michele, I definitely value your encouragement. This is truly a cause worth advocating for. Glad you joined the conversation. Be blessed! – Kia

  7. Thanks for caring and your ministry. I imagine GIVE could be a #4 way to care!
    Leslie recently posted…Forever Joyful Even When Your Child Is SickMy Profile

    • Leslie, I definitely agree with an added number four. It is probably a natural progression because we give to those things or people we care about. Thank you for your insight and for joining the conversation. Be blessed! – Kia

  8. Great post! Praying that God.will break our hearts for what breaks His….many blessings to you ❤️

    • So true Beth. He is completely concerned about the fatherless and there is a tremendous need to care for them. May we all be compelled to do what we can. Thanks for joining the conversation and be blessed! – Kia

  9. From a child who once was fatherless.. beautiful post. One day while struggling with feeling orphaned after the death of my mother.. God wrapped me up in love and whispered, “Don’t let what man didn’t do be greater than what I did for you.” He is the father to the fatherless. I believe you shine His light bright in the work that you do. Much love and blessings always. Misty.

    • Misty, thank you for your beautiful vulnerability. Allow me to scream this truth in to cyberspace, “YOU ARE NOT AN ORPHAN”. Please know that God sees you, loves you, and has adopted you as his own. Just by the fact he mentions the word fatherless 43 times in the Bible, He is concerned about this issue. You are so valued and cherished by the God of the universe and I pray every time you are tempted to feel alone this truth would resonate in your heart. Thank you for stopping by dear friend and joining the conversation. Be blessed! – Kia

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